You're Not a Garden Gnome: Breaking the Moulds That Keep You Playing Small

One of my good friends has taken up pottery.

Throwing it on the wheel, Demi Moore's 'Ghost' version (without Patrick Swayze and 'Unchained Melody' in the background 😉).

It got me thinking about pottery and plaster moulds. You know those things where you pour plaster or clay into a mould to reproduce the same perfect shape over and over again (imagine a row of garden gnomes lined up like soldiers).

Why Authenticity in Business Matters More Than Ever

We're living in a world that's simultaneously demanding authenticity while punishing people for stepping out of line.

AI can replicate almost anything now - except your unique perspective and lived experience. The businesses and leaders who will thrive aren't the ones who play it safest. They're the ones brave enough to be unreplicable.

And yet, most of us are still trying to fit into moulds that were never designed for us in the first place.

The Social Conditioning That Shapes Business Owners

The plaster moulds are like the 'life rules' we are handed when we're younger (and older). The social roles we adopt in our lives and the handbooks that tell us how to think, behave, talk, and even dress!

"Work hard and perform well at school to get ahead in the world."
"Don't make waves - be agreeable and likeable."
"Work hard to have a successful career (based on someone else's definition of success)."

Rules designed to mould us into the same shape. Sometimes with good intentions. Sometimes not.

The problem? You're not born to be the same. You're unique.

But some of us find safety in the rules… even though we also find them restrictive, like a boa constrictor slowly strangling our dreams.

You want to be your own person, but worry that you might be thrown off the island if you do.

How People-Pleasing Shows Up in Your Business

And if you're building a business? This conundrum follows you there.

You can soften your message to avoid any possibility of disagreement - saying what you think people want to hear instead of what you actually believe.

Like staying silent on industry practices you disagree with, or avoiding sharing your real expertise because you're worried about being called non-PC.

Think using the same language as everyone else in your industry because it's "safe" - even though it makes you sound exactly like the 47 other coaches, consultants, or service providers in your space.

Or like offering the same packages and pricing models as your competitors because deviating feels risky, even though you know there's a better way to serve your clients.

Safe. Vanilla. Forgettable.

Or you can own your actual point of view - knowing some people won't agree.

The Hidden Cost of Playing It Safe in Business

Here's what vanilla actually costs you:

Lost Client Connections: The clients who need your specific perspective never find you because you sound like everyone else. They scroll past your content because nothing makes them stop and think, "Finally, someone who gets it."
Missed Opportunities: The opportunities that require a clear point of view pass you by. The speaking gigs, the partnerships, the media features - they go to people who stand for something specific, not everything general.
Wasted Energy: The energy you spend monitoring every word, second-guessing every post, watering down every opinion. That's energy you could be using to serve your people, build your business, or actually live your life.
Building the Wrong Business: And perhaps most costly: you build a business that feels like another job you have to show up for, instead of the expression of who you really are.

What It Really Means to Break the Mould in Business

Here's an example from my own business: I have a different view on productivity for hardworking women. I don't think you need more time management hacks. I think you need to dig into why you're working so hard in the first place (and it's not just for money - really).

Some people don't agree with me, including some coaches and would-be clients. That's fine. They're not my people.

But here's the thing: I'm not a garden gnome. My view is different, and the people I help benefit because it's different.

The women who come to me may be looking for another planner system or the best productivity app - but that's not the real problem. They're exhausted from trying to optimise their way out of something that isn't actually about time management.

They need someone who understands that their overwhelm comes from deeper patterns - from the need to keep working so they can feel productive and good about themselves. From saying yes to everything because that's what "good" people do, from working themselves into the ground because that's what "successful" people do.

The Results of Authentic Business Messaging

When I stopped trying to sound like every other productivity coach and started saying what I actually believed, something shifted. I lost some followers. I had some people unsubscribe. And I found my people - the ones who were waiting for someone to say out loud what they'd been feeling but couldn't articulate (or maybe didn't recognise).

Why Business Owners Struggle to Be Authentic

So if breaking the mould is so valuable, why don't more of us do it?

Because the fear of being "thrown off the island" is real.

We've spent our entire lives learning that fitting in equals safety. That being agreeable equals being liked. That conforming equals belonging.

And for many of us, especially high-achieving women, those rules worked for a long time. They helped us get good grades, promotions, and opportunities. They kept us safe in environments where standing out could have real consequences.

When Old Rules No Longer Serve You

The problem is that those same rules that protected us as employees, students, or team members are now suffocating us as business owners and leaders.

We're afraid that if we say what we really think:

• We'll lose clients (some, yes - the wrong ones)
• People will judge us (some will - and they were never going to buy anyway)
• We'll be seen as difficult or controversial (by people who prefer comfort over growth)
• We'll miss out on opportunities (the ones that weren't right for us in the first place)

But here's what we don't talk about enough: the cost of NOT breaking the mould is higher than any of those fears.

Why Your Unique Perspective Matters

You're meant to break out of that mould because when you do, that's when you give yourself permission to be 100% you. No one else has the EXACT same experience of life as you, so of course no one else has the same point of view.

Your real opinions, experience, skills and characteristics are what make you, you - and that's what the world needs more of, not less.

The people who need to hear your message? They're waiting for someone brave enough to say what everyone else is tiptoeing around.

They don't want vanilla. They want truth.

Your truth.

How to Start Breaking the Mould in Your Business

Pick one area where you're softening your message or hiding your real opinion. Your messaging? Your leadership style? Your wardrobe (yes, you can ditch those 1990s power suits)?

A Simple Exercise for Finding Your Authentic Voice

Write down what you actually believe - just for you. And then start with just one person. Tell them what you really think.

You don't have to announce your controversial opinions to the entire internet. You don't have to burn it all down and start over.

Just start with honesty. One conversation. One email. One post where you say what you really think, not what you think people want to hear.

Building a Business That Reflects Who You Really Are

The moulds were never designed for you anyway. They were designed for garden gnomes.
And you are something more. You are someone the world has never seen before.

What are your thoughts? Where are you still conforming to moulds that don't fit who you are?